"Turn this sinking boat, and point it home, we've still got time."

I've had a rough day, or to properly describe things, it would be that I had a rough week. To start things off, I got stung by someone close to me and now I feel like I've lost a good friend. Work's been slower than slow and with all the free time on my hands, I am at a loss of what to do with myself. Yesterday's project went totally side ways as my equipment fails me once again and today, I cut myself and while putting on a band aid, I got hit in the head (my right temple) with a super heavy and hard lacrosse ball. I almost wanted to sit down on the ground, stomp my feet and wave my arms in the air and throw a super tantrum. WTF is going on?

I feel like I'm sinking a bit. People are worried that I am depressed because I've some how, in the span of the past 2 weeks, locked myself up in my car and thrown away the keys. I went from "you're doing great" and "let's try every possible colour in the spectrum of the rainbow" to "let me just sit here and rot because there's no point in trying any more".

But really.. what is the point in trying? I feel unworthy and stupid more than 50% of my day. The other 50% is spent questioning may be I am doing something right but most likely wrong. And to add to all of this, I feel fat. oh and that I have no one to count on. Once again I've fallen into that familiar bitterness which I know all too well since moving back to Vancouver. I think I seriously need to get outta here.